Thursday, May 27, 2010

Mis Amigos

I would like to give a huge shout out to my bff Cassie! Cassie is my first official blog follower - whoop whoop!

I figured that since my life pretty much revolves around my friends and their salacious gossip, I need to introduce them to my reading public. (Now that I think about it, my reading public probably consists of all of my friends... but at least you kids can get to know each other again!)

Cassie hails from Raleigh, NC by way of New Jersey. Don't worry, she's not one of those Jersey Shore chicks. She's been in NC for far too long to succumb to the hair pouf and bump-it phase that is sweeping the nation yet again. Cassie has been my #1 encourager from my first mention of starting a blog (I'm so glad someone else thinks I'm funny!) and I cannot thank her enough for that.

Cassie, who I will sometimes refer to as Red, and I met in college at UNCW. We were both Gamma Chi's during our senior years. Even though Cassie was a rival Alpha Phi and I was a Sigma Sigma Sigma, we hit it off from the get go - and we haven't let go of each other since! THANK.GOD. because I would go crazy if I did not talk to this woman on a daily basis.

Megan Alexis was born, raised, and currently resides in Southampton, NY. Megan and I also met in college - her sophomore year, my freshman year. We were both pledges for Sigma and bonded instantly. Today, we share a love of anything pink, sparkly, and/or containing champagne. Megan knows me inside and out and graciously shares with me the stories of poop, farts, puke, and the like. I desperately wish that Megan lived near me but alas, she has family business to tend to in NY. She's pretty popular.

Rachael hails from my don't-blink-or-you'll-miss-it hometown but currently resides in Owings Mills, MD. I lovingly refer to Rachael as Gina. I'm not sure how or why this nickname originated, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with her large ass and boobs. Gina and I met when we were 15 (Maybe? Gina is SO much better with dates than I am.) and playing club volleyball together in the off-season. It turns out that I had gone to school with her cousins since kindergarten - I knew her whole family except for her. Her dad and my dad also played baseball together back in the day, so our parents knew each other as well. Small world! Well, not really coming from our town, but you get my drift. Gina and I are known for our 3-4 hour long phone dates where she dominates a majority of the conversation with her lengthy and detailed stories (bless her heart).

Jenna is my step-sister and bff. She still lives in the world's smallest town in MD but works at the Navy Yard in D.C. I commonly refer to Jenna as either "my sister" or "Jenn." My dad (Gregg) married her mom (Sharon) in 2000. They dated for a few years before that but don't ask me how long because I honestly don't remember - let's just say they've been together since the beginning of time. They really are made for each other. How they both were married to other people long enough to have children is a mystery to me.

Anyways, Jenna and I bonded during our teenage years and have been having a blast ever since! There used to be a time when we were both size 2's and could share clothes... sadly, those days came to an end 10 years ago. While we are both still skinny, she wins the "big boob" award. Not because she acts like a fool, but because she really does have the bigger boobs.

Natalie-Anne and I met during our sophomore year of college through a mutual friend. The friendship was very convenient seeing as how we would have at least one class together each semester thereafter. How the two of us managed to survive so long without each other is a small miracle! Nat is so friendly and nice, although very straight to the point. She doesn't sugarcoat anything (hello, that's why she's a doctor!) so you know we get along like two peas in a pod! Nat is doing the one thing that I said I wanted to do but just didn't have the energy to complete - she is becoming a veterinarian. She has completed an additional 4 years of grueling education and is now in the process of taking her boards. She will pass, of course, with flying colors but just needs some encouragement along the way. YOU GO GIRL!

I was fortunate enough to be a bridesmaid in Nat's wedding to Michael on New Year's Eve in 2008. (This wedding is also known as the most fun wedding I've ever attended. I'm not sure if that's due to the fact that I was watching my best friend get married on my favorite holiday, or if it was due to the 4 bottles of champagne that I alone consumed. Either way, it went down in the record books!) Little did Michael realize that he is now not only stuck with Natalie, but he is also stuck with me. There are many a day when he comes home from work to find Nat and I plopped down on the couch watching Wheel of Fortune and screaming at the TV (hey, at least we cook dinner for him). Our evenings usually end with Michael terrorizing the elderly feline, Tinkerbell, followed by a friendly game (or eight) on the Wii.

(This next person isn't really a good friend, but I include him in the group nonetheless. I will probably talk, complain, make fun of, etc. about this person until the day I die... so I felt the need to include a brief synopsis.)

Rob is my boss in Wilmington, NC. He was born and raised somewhere in the midwest - Illinois, maybe? - but his parents live in Tennessee and he went to like, two different colleges which really confuses me. Currently, his lips and every other body part are attached to a certain clitoris so I don't see much of him outside of work anymore. We used to often grab lunch together, head out to Tower 7 for dollar taco night on Mondays, grab beers on the weekend, etc. Rob is so needy and whiny, that I often wonder how he snagged himself a girlfriend. For a while there, everyone thought I was going to have to marry Rob because it seemed that I was the only one who knew how to handle his nonsense. I thank God every day for creating someone as patient (but clearly not as awesome or attractive) as I and able to deal with little Robbie.

Rob's sister, Jamie, is a super fun gal! I have yet to actually meet her in person, but we chat on Facebook from time to time. She's a jazz singer on a cruise ship in the Mediterranean. Her life is really difficult sometimes. I'm still trying to figure out a way to pass as her sister so I can get a free vacation.


*Note: I know I have not included some of my nearest and dearest friends in this list. Do not fear! I will be updating this list over the next week. Please check back for your amazingly awesome description!*

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