Staff Meetings

Is anyone else required to attend weekly staff meetings? I really feel like they are a waste of my time. Allow me to explain why...

You see, my boss, Rob, is a pretty busy guy. He's our Executive Director so he's always out schmoozing and hob-knobbing with "high society" in Wilmington. Either that or he's in meetings all day (which are also probably pointless). Because Rob is barely in the office, none of "his" employees have a chance to ask him questions or update him on office/campus happenings. This is when staff meetings come into play.

I was always under the impression that staff meetings were a time for one to brainstorm and collaborate with co-workers (at least, that's what they have been at my previous professional jobs), and maybe briefly share with others what you have coming up over the next few days - if you feel so inclined to do so (I rarely do). At this job, however, staff meetings are a time when Lindsay, Crystal, and Kim ask/tell Rob what's going on in their day-to-day lives. I frankly do not care because I already hear about this nonsense on an hourly basis. I have enough work related things to worry about. I do not want to hear about how a member of the Board didn't RSVP for an event but showed up anyways and complained the whole time about how cold the food was or how the trashcan was full. (And I kid you not when I say that these are topics of discussion.)

If I have something to tell/ask Rob, do you know what I do? I PICK UP THE PHONE! (It's probably a new fad and hasn't quite reached the other side of the office yet, but I find that it works fabulously well for me. Folks on campus have even taken to using this device!) I think that Alexander Graham Bell sheds a tear every time someone properly utilizes his invention. I'm not quite sure who invented the Blackberry, but I'm sure that Rob is making that person proud by knowingly using said device to answer my frequent calls.

I really don't see the point in wasting everyone else's time talking about budget issues that do not pertain to them. If it were me - and this happens to me often - I would not want to sit around a table listening to someone ramble on and on about which table linens to use so that they hit the floor just so in an effort to conceal the table legs and scratches on the floor. Just choose a damn linen and give me the bill so I can pay for it, ok?

So, if you ever need to reach me on Wednesdays between the hours of 10 a.m. and noon, chances are I'm downstairs slitting my wrists with my fingernails and unraveling the carpet with my pen.

Dr. McGraw

For the past few weeks, I have been visiting Dr. Eric McGraw at Active Care Chiropractic for treatment on my right shoulder and left knee. Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I can't sit still and that these joints have been giving me issues for years. With that being said, it is also fairly easy to surmise that going to the doctor is a big deal for me because I know he's going to tell me that I'm not allowed to do what I love - most recently, running, boot camp, and playing volleyball. I was a bio major - I know that my body needs time to heal. But dammit I just don't like sitting still! I should have just gotten him to work on one area at a time so that way I could still run while he's working on my shoulder, or still swim and do arm work while he's working on my knee. Did I do that? No, of course not. Why? Because I was captivated by his beauty. (OK, not really... but maybe just a smidge.)

I visit Dr. McSteamy, er, I mean, McGraw 2-3 times per week, depending on how badly he hurts me at the previous appointment. He practices what is called active release therapy, which is really just him massaging the muscles, tendons, and ligaments surrounding my problem areas in an effort to break up and disperse scar tissue. Apparently, because I've been such an avid athlete for 20 years, I have large amounts of scar tissue that is "not normal" for people my age. Go figure.

Needless to say, I hurt after visiting this man. It takes every ounce of energy I have just to make it home (which is only 4 miles away) and snag the ice pack from the jam packed freezer. (I have this handy dandy ice pack thing by Cryo-Max that fits into a little sleeve and affixes to itself with velcro. It's the best invention! That way I don't have to worry about cold condensation hitting my skin, thereby causing the ice pack to slip off of my body. The photo below is similar to what I have now. Mine is just two of the squares, although I wouldn't mind having the one below. Anyways, you get the point.)

I'll ice my shoulder for 20 minutes while I catch up on emails, then switch the pack to my knee for 20 minutes with my leg propped up, and then switch back to my shoulder for 20 minutes. As you can probably tell from this dialog, my shoulder hurts more than my knee. I like to compare that pain to childbirth, but I've never experienced childbirth so that's probably not a good example... let's just say that I'd almost rather have monthly cramps than have this shoulder pain for the rest of my life. (This therapy is an attempt to "heal" my shoulder so I do not have to have surgery any time soon. Fingers crossed that it works!)

Aside from having to shell out 50$ every time I go to see Dr. McGraw, I will say one fabulous thing about vising him: he really keeps me motivated to shave my legs.

Mis Amigos

I would like to give a huge shout out to my bff Cassie! Cassie is my first official blog follower - whoop whoop!

I figured that since my life pretty much revolves around my friends and their salacious gossip, I need to introduce them to my reading public. (Now that I think about it, my reading public probably consists of all of my friends... but at least you kids can get to know each other again!)

Cassie hails from Raleigh, NC by way of New Jersey. Don't worry, she's not one of those Jersey Shore chicks. She's been in NC for far too long to succumb to the hair pouf and bump-it phase that is sweeping the nation yet again. Cassie has been my #1 encourager from my first mention of starting a blog (I'm so glad someone else thinks I'm funny!) and I cannot thank her enough for that.

Cassie, who I will sometimes refer to as Red, and I met in college at UNCW. We were both Gamma Chi's during our senior years. Even though Cassie was a rival Alpha Phi and I was a Sigma Sigma Sigma, we hit it off from the get go - and we haven't let go of each other since! THANK.GOD. because I would go crazy if I did not talk to this woman on a daily basis.

Megan Alexis was born, raised, and currently resides in Southampton, NY. Megan and I also met in college - her sophomore year, my freshman year. We were both pledges for Sigma and bonded instantly. Today, we share a love of anything pink, sparkly, and/or containing champagne. Megan knows me inside and out and graciously shares with me the stories of poop, farts, puke, and the like. I desperately wish that Megan lived near me but alas, she has family business to tend to in NY. She's pretty popular.

Rachael hails from my don't-blink-or-you'll-miss-it hometown but currently resides in Owings Mills, MD. I lovingly refer to Rachael as Gina. I'm not sure how or why this nickname originated, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with her large ass and boobs. Gina and I met when we were 15 (Maybe? Gina is SO much better with dates than I am.) and playing club volleyball together in the off-season. It turns out that I had gone to school with her cousins since kindergarten - I knew her whole family except for her. Her dad and my dad also played baseball together back in the day, so our parents knew each other as well. Small world! Well, not really coming from our town, but you get my drift. Gina and I are known for our 3-4 hour long phone dates where she dominates a majority of the conversation with her lengthy and detailed stories (bless her heart).

Jenna is my step-sister and bff. She still lives in the world's smallest town in MD but works at the Navy Yard in D.C. I commonly refer to Jenna as either "my sister" or "Jenn." My dad (Gregg) married her mom (Sharon) in 2000. They dated for a few years before that but don't ask me how long because I honestly don't remember - let's just say they've been together since the beginning of time. They really are made for each other. How they both were married to other people long enough to have children is a mystery to me.

Anyways, Jenna and I bonded during our teenage years and have been having a blast ever since! There used to be a time when we were both size 2's and could share clothes... sadly, those days came to an end 10 years ago. While we are both still skinny, she wins the "big boob" award. Not because she acts like a fool, but because she really does have the bigger boobs.

Natalie-Anne and I met during our sophomore year of college through a mutual friend. The friendship was very convenient seeing as how we would have at least one class together each semester thereafter. How the two of us managed to survive so long without each other is a small miracle! Nat is so friendly and nice, although very straight to the point. She doesn't sugarcoat anything (hello, that's why she's a doctor!) so you know we get along like two peas in a pod! Nat is doing the one thing that I said I wanted to do but just didn't have the energy to complete - she is becoming a veterinarian. She has completed an additional 4 years of grueling education and is now in the process of taking her boards. She will pass, of course, with flying colors but just needs some encouragement along the way. YOU GO GIRL!

I was fortunate enough to be a bridesmaid in Nat's wedding to Michael on New Year's Eve in 2008. (This wedding is also known as the most fun wedding I've ever attended. I'm not sure if that's due to the fact that I was watching my best friend get married on my favorite holiday, or if it was due to the 4 bottles of champagne that I alone consumed. Either way, it went down in the record books!) Little did Michael realize that he is now not only stuck with Natalie, but he is also stuck with me. There are many a day when he comes home from work to find Nat and I plopped down on the couch watching Wheel of Fortune and screaming at the TV (hey, at least we cook dinner for him). Our evenings usually end with Michael terrorizing the elderly feline, Tinkerbell, followed by a friendly game (or eight) on the Wii.

(This next person isn't really a good friend, but I include him in the group nonetheless. I will probably talk, complain, make fun of, etc. about this person until the day I die... so I felt the need to include a brief synopsis.)

Rob is my boss in Wilmington, NC. He was born and raised somewhere in the midwest - Illinois, maybe? - but his parents live in Tennessee and he went to like, two different colleges which really confuses me. Currently, his lips and every other body part are attached to a certain clitoris so I don't see much of him outside of work anymore. We used to often grab lunch together, head out to Tower 7 for dollar taco night on Mondays, grab beers on the weekend, etc. Rob is so needy and whiny, that I often wonder how he snagged himself a girlfriend. For a while there, everyone thought I was going to have to marry Rob because it seemed that I was the only one who knew how to handle his nonsense. I thank God every day for creating someone as patient (but clearly not as awesome or attractive) as I and able to deal with little Robbie.

Rob's sister, Jamie, is a super fun gal! I have yet to actually meet her in person, but we chat on Facebook from time to time. She's a jazz singer on a cruise ship in the Mediterranean. Her life is really difficult sometimes. I'm still trying to figure out a way to pass as her sister so I can get a free vacation.

*Note: I know I have not included some of my nearest and dearest friends in this list. Do not fear! I will be updating this list over the next week. Please check back for your amazingly awesome description!*

Julie and Julia and my Parisian Obsession

Anyone who knows me knows of my love for anything and everything having to do with Paris. Movies, therefore, should be no exception. Movies about Paris, in fact, are probably THE worst punishment I bring upon myself. These movies are the biggest reminder that I must reside in the good ol' ewe-ess-of-ay because this is where my job resides. (Speaking of... does anyone know of any companies in Europe that are hiring?! Or maybe an American company that will allow me to telecommute from Europe?!)

I was at the Redbox a couple of months ago, paging through movies that I haven't yet seen, when I stumbled upon Julie & Julia. For some reason, I never got around to seeing this movie in the theater, and still I was DYING to see it (I blame it on work). When I saw it at the RB, I just knew that little red box containing the delightment that is Julie & Julia had to make it's way over the bridge to Wrightsville Beach. And so, it did... and I was enamored from the very first second. (I have probably failed to mention that not only do I adore Paris, but I adore cooking and eating (and always have). I also adore movies that take place in an era other than that in which I am currently living, specifically the 1940s and 1950s.)

I don't know what it is about this movie that encapsulates Paris and all that it entails, but it's good enough for me! There aren't that many scenes where Julia is out and about in the city of Paris itself (Julie never actually leaves NYC in this movie), but something about her experiences while living and learning to cook in Paris emulates a native Parisian's lifestyle. Wouldn't it be lovely to live in Europe and do nothing but attempt to blend in? (When does my flight leave?!)

Needless to say, a few months after the initial viewing, when I saw that Julie & Julia was on sale at the Target for 7$, I had to purchase it. I am watching it now and my heart is breaking, mainly because I am not in Paris.

Did I also mention that I just returned from Paris in mid-October?! Maybe I need to see a therapist about this obsession... or maybe I really should just move there instead...

P.S. - Jane Lynch is also in this movie and I adore her! I shall save my love of Glee for another post.